TWO ARMS, ONE JACKET
by Ballyuk
Summary: Observing a President at work can be a real eye opener, but Josh learns the hard way that some things really should be left to the experts. Set around the latter half of season 1.


Author's Note: I do not own any of the characters. Also, it is bloody hard to write dialogue that has the snap and detail Aaron Sorkin is known for!

* * *

 **TWO ARMS, ONE JACKET.**

* * *

Josh had called his erstwhile assistant Donna into his office ten minutes earlier. After taking care of his 101 other requests, she stepped in but couldn't see him anywhere. Everything was where it should be but Josh was nowhere to be found. Had he forgotten that he'd requested her presence?

"Donna?" came a pained cry from somewhere in the room.

Closing the door carefully but leaving it slightly ajar, she looked around. Stepping around his desk, she saw him lying on the floor with his jacket half-draped over his shoulders. Josh was breathing heavily and had a film of sweat on his brow. He was in agony.

"Josh! Oh my god, what happened?" she asked in concern as she moved his chair aside and knelt down beside him.

"Donna, could you call a doctor please? I'm in a _lot_ of pain here," Josh spoke through gritted teeth. He was favouring his right arm.

Donna leapt up and grabbed the phone, dialling out and requesting one of the White House medics to come to Josh's office immediately. Kneeling back down, she again asked him what had happened.

"I was putting my jacket on and felt my shoulder give out. I think I dislocated it." His voice was raspy because speaking at his normal volume only intensified the pain.

He was trying not to move but Donna instinctively lay her hand down on his injured shoulder, causing him to flinch and yell out.

"Aarrrgggghhhh Donna! I just told you it was my shoulder, why'd you have to touch it?"

Donna retracted her hand quickly and winced. "Oh sorry sorry sorry!"

CJ had been walking by the office to get an update on a matter that was certain to be brought up at her next press briefing when she heard the cries of pain. Opening the door and stepping inside, she could see Donna kneeling beside the desk.

"Hey Donna, what's going on?"

"Josh thinks he popped his shoulder putting his jacket on. The doctor's on his way," Donna replied.

CJ was confused. How could you injure yourself simply by putting on a jacket? Was this another one of those examples of freak injuries you often read about on the internet? Like slipping on tortoise crap and knocking yourself out? Or breaking your toe when putting your pants on? Or putting your back out when contorted on the bed as…? She trailed off that thought. Her university days contained a few memories best forgotten. This being Josh, she had to consider such scenarios though. She'd seen him in the staff meeting only an hour ago. Was this the gods getting payback for Josh creating an absolute car crash of a press briefing that time when she couldn't do it because of root canal treatment?

"Josh, what the hell did you do?"

Josh looked up at CJ towering over his desk before sinking his head back onto the carpet in weary despair. His embarrassment was almost complete. "Oh great, just what I needed. An audience! My shoulder gave out when I was putting on my jacket."

A voice outside the office stopped everybody in their tracks. It was Toby, and he was in trademark annoyed mood. When things were going smoothly, he could be very affable and engaging. Today, things were not going smoothly. He was making his way to the office, calling out while reading through a folder so it was only once he'd stepped into Josh's office that he realised something was amiss. He looked at both Donna kneeling beside the desk, and CJ standing peering over it.

"Josh, where are we with the script for the gala speech?"

He'd been so focussed on the latest task that he hadn't noticed the doctor heading into the office behind him. The doctor swerved around Toby deftly as he made his way over to the stricken Josh. Donna got up and moved out of the way to give the doctor some space.

"So Josh, how did this happen?" asked the doctor as he gently looked over Josh's injured arm.

Josh winced as he moved to sit up and enable the doctor to remove his jacket. He really didn't want to have to explain the situation but now that he had a captive audience all eager to know what had happened, he sighed resignedly.

"I was putting my jacket on, and my shoulder popped out and popped back in again."

Toby and CJ looked at one another, knowing that he was not telling the full story.

"What? That's what happened!" he continued as he saw their sceptical expressions. "Tell 'em Donna!"

Donna went wide-eyed as everybody turned their attention to her.

"Josh, I don't know how it happened. I found you like this, remember?"

Josh, still in agony and now feeling like a cornered rat, foolishly decided that a little admonishment of his faithful assistant was in order. He knew though as he uttered the words that Donna's reply would be something deadpan and make him look like an idiot. He didn't know how she did that but she had a knack for it. It happened a lot.

"Nice. It would be great if you would just back me up on this one Donna!"

Donna replied in exactly the way he'd expected. "I'm sorry Josh. If I went around backing people up without knowing the facts, I'd have voted for the other guy."

Josh looked up at Donna, cursing himself. Steeling a glance at CJ, he could tell she was disappointed in him. He really didn't want to look in Toby's direction. The office had suddenly become a lot warmer in the last couple of minutes, and he was sure it was due to Toby's blood boiling. Toby was next to speak up.

"That's great, Josh. You realise I'm gonna have to tell Leo and the President your shoulder popped out when you were putting on your jacket, when they ask what the hell happened," Toby stated bluntly. The lack of empathy with his stricken colleague was palpable.

As Josh sat up fully with his arm being held by the doctor, he felt the need to defend himself once more. _Could somebody please show a little sympathy towards me?_

"Toby, come on, that's all that happened, honest!"

CJ wasn't buying it either, so Josh really had no choice but to voice the embarrassing tale as the others listened on, incredulous.

* * *

 _A little earlier._

Lord John Marbury had been regaling Leo, Josh, Toby, CJ, Sam and the President with tales of derring-do during his time serving in India. Though he was overly fond of a good drink and often presented an image of the typical British upper-class dandy, he possessed a remarkably sharp political mind and an ability to bring historical analogies and references into current affairs. Whatever one thought of him personally, they always found that they'd learned something new from spending even a few minutes of time in his company. He made for the most brilliant of dinner guests. The President particularly loved the way the ambassador poked fun at Leo, who usually retorted through gritted teeth, maintaining a dignified and gracious demeanour towards the President's guest in an attempt to disguise his own jibes.

Today's meeting had been little more than a catch-up from their previous discussion, during which Lord Marbury had promised to source an early edition of Chaucer's 'Canterbury Tales'. It was here that the eccentric Earl and Marquess of somewhere or other presented him with said copy of the literary classic, complete with leather sleeve. Though grateful for the gift, the President had an engagement requiring his presence elsewhere shortly so the meeting was fairly brief.

As they made their way to leave the Oval office, Josh watched the President talking to his personal assistant Charlie as he went to grab his jacket. With one deft move, the President had swung the jacket behind his shoulders, raising his arms so the sleeves enveloped them instantly before bringing it down and adjusting the jacket from the front. It was deft, it was elaborate and it always looked so fricking cool, thought Josh. Everybody knew about it but nobody ever discussed it or even gave it a name.

 _How fricking cool is that? That is how you put on a jacket!_

* * *

In a matter of moments, the doctor had completed his examination. He was more than aware of the tense ambience in the room right now.

"OK Josh, it looks like your shoulder popped back in, but we'll need to take you to hospital to get it checked out thoroughly. I think we can rule out head trauma though."

"Oh I wouldn't be too hasty with that assessment, doc." Toby kept his voice low and neutral but if one were to look more closely, they might have seen the vein popping in his head. CJ and Donna had subconsciously begun to back away slowly. He was holding the file in one hand, slapping it against the palm of the other like a gang member holding a baseball bat. If looks could kill.

* * *

 _Later that day._

The President stood up from his chair, arms on the desk, deep in thought having digested the information. Any second now, he would be launching into one of his monologues containing a liberal sprinkling of Biblical quotes and Latin phrases. It was his way of recognising the mirth in situations where he had to remain and behave in his official capacity.

"Toby, I need you to work on a press release. We must act post haste to ensure my mistakes do not come back to bite us. We cannot afford to be seen as reckless with our physical well-being. 'He that covereth up his sins shall not prosper; but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy'. From now on, I must be wary of my every deed and lead through action and not words. _Operibus anteire_."

Toby remained rooted to the spot. He knew the President was being facetious over the matter and in truth, it _was_ fairly trivial. Toby wasn't going to point that out though. He simply waited for the President to dismiss everybody so he didn't have to continue standing there feeling embarrassed. Why should he be feeling embarrassed though? It wasn't as though he was at fault in any way. Toby simply hated to be the one to point out anything stupid to the President.

However, things would carry on as normal. The Bartlet administration had had its fair share of hiccups but by and large, it was a well-oiled machine, and that was due to having people like Leo, Toby, CJ, Sam and even Josh around.

* * *

 **FIN.**


End file.
